Friday, May 27, 2005

::: Holy Moly ::: C*nts Corner :::

::: Holy Moly ::: C*nts Corner :::

This site is ACE ('cause I'm not on it).

"Ghosts : Spooky fucking c*nts. Not to be trusted. Go into the light, you insubtantial shite-hawk c*nts."


Evertonians eh? What can you do?

All of a sudden some folk are in mourning after liverpool's reminds me of a bit from my favourite Father Ted :

FR.TED: What would have to happen this season to keep you happy?

DOUGAL: Ah Nothing Ted...Everton are rubbish and I'm just there for a laugh.

FR.TED: You wouldn't say, want Everton to survive in the Premiership?

DOUGAL Hoo wow! That'd be fantastic. Still being in the Premiership at the end of the season. Yeah that'd be one, oh brilliant.

FR.TED: And what else would have to happen for you to be happy?

DOUGAL: Ah no, that'd be fine. Survival would be fine.

FR.TED: You wouldn't like the blues getting into The Champions League or something?

DOUGAL: Hooo God yeah. I'd love to be in the Champions League like Real Madrid or something. Hoo that'd be brilliant.

FR.TED: So eh, anything else?

DOUGAL: Ah no, that'd be fine. If I had a Premiership place and a place in Europe, I think I could be happy.

FR.TED: You wouldn't want say mmmm.....liverpool to lose the Champions League final?

DOUGAL: Hoo God yeah! I'd love that. If they got beat and we survived AND we were in Europe. That'd be grand.

FR.TED: You've never had much of an imagination, have you Dougal?

DOUGAL: No you're right there Ted.

Some people are actually getting wound up by all this "Everton aren't good enough to represent England, liverpool should take their place" malarkey getting peddled by idiots in the more tabloid side of the media.

For God's sake why do people fall for these agent provocateurs all the time. liverpool haven't's upto UEFA whether they change their rules. There is no way Everton can lose out. People need to relax....otherwise they'll get ulcers


Thursday, May 26, 2005

The tempted fates

That's quite a cool name for a band however it refers to the various goons sending gloating text messages at half time last night. In football counting chickens tends to leave you with egg on your face.

Whatever way you look at it it was a pretty impressive which netted me £40. Don't get me wrong I have preferred them not to win it but Milan looked well shaky in the semi and liverpool (as a lifetime of supporting Everton has taught me) are jammy, jammy bastards. Business is business.

In other news I'm very intrigued by the concept of Sports Arbitrage...If I had time to do it full time it seems a pretty good way of making a living.

Sports Arbitrage Review

It basically is a system of looking at the difference in various bookmakers odds until you notice slight differences in their odds setting up scenarios where you can't possibly lose.

For example if bookmaker A has Tim Henman as 11/10 to *snigger* win a tennis match bookmaker be thinks that actually Greg Rusedski is 11/10 then a bet on both with leds to a small but guaranteed return.

Perhaps the house doesn't always win.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


Good God...I know the BBC staff were on strike but that doesn't give those who've scabbed their way into work carte blanche to play "You'll Never Walk Alone" on 5Live first thing in the morning.

Shelagh Fogarty, a scouser crossing a picket line, hang your dirty rednose head in shame.


Friday, May 20, 2005


Offline for most of this this week as me and Anne were off spending frightening amounts of cash on white good and furniture for the new house. Think we got everything sorted before the spending limit was reached.

I've discovered that there is no upper limit on what people will charge for a couch. I am also amazed there is a single cow left on the planet judging by the number of leather couches on sale.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

I rock

My bro mailed me today....their bank cards arrived in Buenos Aires on the day they were due to leave. This meant a dash across town to the post office to get them then an even madder dash to the ferry terminal to cross into Uruguay (a full 15 minutes to spare). Phew...they've got their bank cards and are back up & running.

Played footy last night, always fun...did okay but my knee was hurting a lot by the end of it. *sigh*

Monday, May 09, 2005

We shall not be moved.

The People's Forum

Erm....I don't know what to say. I thought I'd be bouncing off the walls however in the event it just a smouldering layer of confused happiness. Everton will finish the season 4th, above our lovable local neighbours and in a Champions League qualification spot. I am still kind of stunned.

On Saturday Goodison was nervy and started off happy enough. The Gwladys Street roared into life (We even had a chrous of The Royal Blue Mersey) but as the game progressed jitters set in for both fan & player alike. It was sheer relief when Davie Weir snuck in at the back post to knock a header into the Park End goal. After that it seemed a bit more straightforward (Tim Cahill suckered one of their players into swinging at him...adios my stupid Geordie friend) and we finished the game 2-0 to the good and 6 points ahead of liverpool & Bolton. A wonderful way to end a fabulous season. Goodison was awash with happiness "We shall not be moved", "We're looking down on the redsh*te" and "We're the pride of Merseyside" echoed from the rafters. The final whistle went and that was it............................erm........Wow.

The players paraded round the ground and we saluted them like the heroes they are. We all knew that one more point would see us guaranteed 4th....touching distance from the unthinkable. Some bluenoses point out, quite rightly, that it's sickening that 4th spot is being touted as the ultimate glory. Nil Satis Nisi Optimum means that we should be craving the league title and our 10th championship....Still, in this day and age of the G14 rich-kids only club 4th place with a truly laughable budget is a pretty fine how to celebrate?

If there is a finer matchday pub than Tha Black Horse on County Road then I really look forward to visiting it. Decent beer, nice staff, lots of televisions tuned to the footy and a top bunch of bluenoses with which to enjoy it all with. After the match on Saturday the place was rocking and even the most cynical & unemotional Evertonian was beaming with happiness at what our side has done this season. We sang ourselves hoarse and realised what it meant to everyone. Even the most optimistic blue bought their season tickets convinced we were on our way out of the Premiership. When we predicted headlines of "Everton on the brink" we didn't think it would be the European elite we'd be on the brink of. Yet there we were....smiling and hugging each other and trying to put it all into words. At the end of the day we gave up and joined in the singing.

Sunday was a nervy affair.....liverpool could still take our place from us. They had the difficult task of beating Arsenal at the first half the Gunners battered them and went into the break 2-0 to the good. The second half was utterly comical dive from Alonso was rewarded with a free-kick that was deflected into the net and in North London and Merseyside backsides began to twitch. Arsenal spent the rest of the half defending for their lives but held out and in the end won 3-1. We were there....and I'm still not sure what to make of it all.

We've been in the top 4 since mid-September...we are there on merit. Champions League here we come. "We shall not be moved!"

Friday, May 06, 2005

Well that went as well as could be expected fellow electoral roll members aren't as stupid as Howard, Letwin & Lynton Crosby were hoping. I am a Labour voting Liberal coward...The Conservatives "Are you thinking..." campaign pushed me right back into the Labour fold despite being very dissillusioned with Tony Blair et al.

As events unfolded the BBC gasped and predicted doom for Labour. The exit poll predicted a Labour majority of over 60 but every snippet of information was dissected and presented as further evidence that Labour should be very, very worried. Jeremy Paxman & Peter Snow were like pigs in sh*t...all very dramatic. Then at 2am I turned over to ITV to find them 40 results ahead and basically saying everything was going as expected.

As it turns out they were dead right...all that missed sleep for nothing. A reduced majority is about right I think. As far as I can see though the Liberal attack on the Conservative vote didn't materialise. We were looking forward to Howard and Letwin's seat being threatened but it didn't really happen. Charlie, Menzies and the boys just seemed to pick-up anti-Labour protest votes. Plus ca change.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Drinking Games

Drinking Games at Bar-None

Is it a sign you've got a problem if you dream of perfectly well thought out, playable drinking games? In my there was a game called Kangaroo Court where upon a person makes an accusation towards the rest of the people there, if a person is guilty as charged he/she must stand on there chair and down their pint (possibly with lots of people singing 'down in one' or 'hang the bastard high' as it is downed).

If the no-one is guilty or more than one person is guilty then the accuser has to do the honours....once the pint is finished the person can turn super-grass and throw out another accusation to the floor.

My sub-conscious, it would seem, is a member of some un-named rugby club.

In other news my impersonation of Lucy Montgomery (Voice of The Museum of Everything) is far too accurate for comfort and I can't the get horrible thought of Nicolas Parsons propositioning Julia Hartley-Brewer on Have I Got News For You out of my head.


BBC NEWS | Election 2005 | Poll Tracker

BBC NEWS Election 2005 Poll Tracker

It appears that the BBC are going into overdrive sniping at anything Blair does or says (I don't mind this but the up-shot of it all might be Howard et al running the country for the next 4 years).

It's polling day on Thursday and I've still got that sick feeling that despite everything the Labour vote is going to stay at home or register a Lib Dem protest vote whilst all those little Englanders have just the excuses they need to vote for Howard & Letwin et voila.

*SIGH* Hope not......what does it say about us if we all jump on a band wagon whose main thrusts are limits on Asylum & immigration, cleaner hospitals & lowering tax (a band wagon being driven by the son of an illegal immigrant asylum seeker who was a member of the government who privatised the cleaning of hospitals in the first place & who had to sack his party chief for admitting they had a hidden agenda on taxation). Are people really not thinking what I'm thinking?